What holds a relationship together? Why is it that some people seem to be able to help others succeed and empower their own success?
If you want to succeed in love, how can you be sure you know what a pertner wants in you? Do you even know what you want yourself?
What if you think you know what your lover wants and then you find you have totally different vales?
Why does your lovers habits, push all your buttons? Drive you crazy because you can’t live with them or without them?
Most of use ener a relationship either infatuated with a dream image and scarred by past loves.
The truth is, your soulmate is already waitng for us, if only we discovred what values we were chasing in thefragments of perfection we find in so many others.
The answer is in knowing yourself and knowing your own core values and then enpowered by that knowledge, being able to take control of life.
…. or by ignoring it.
When you know your values you can direct your own ship. You know which way to set your sails and catch the winds of change for your own success. You have the power to make your relationship a rewarding experience.
A directionless love is wearing and negative. It soon wilts with the hammerings of frustration and unfulfilled desires. Potentially, it could drift into unhealthily making the other feel uncomfortable.
Eighty percent of lifes success depends on meeting others peoples iner core values, being able to know and meet people’s needs leads to the greatest success in life or love.. Not technical skill.
Underneath all the window dressing of philosophy and religion is the idea that al forces andenergies are within you.
“Between positively and negatively charged particles is a center point of light. Between positively and negatively charged emotions is the center point of love” wrote John Demartini.
“The center point is what every human being already is, yet elusively still seeks. True love is our ultimate objective, whether we’re aware of it or not.”
Does that sound a little too mystical to you? Is your success fate? Is love the reuniting of soulmates? Or are we simply driven by evolutionary forces?
We are a mix of many forces, both good and bad, biological and . We see this when the most beautiful ideas are turned to evil – or when destructive people realise that all their fruistration can be turned to good to become a great a success.
John Demartini is reminding us that there is desire for love that we are flailing toward if only we knew it.
We see this in love, and sex.
Sex is important to people. Whatever your opinion, 5% of web searches are sex related. We can neither deny our biological desires, or their historical and at times mythological influence on our lives.
But our view of love, sex and success is determined by our values.
These are the filter through which we see the world. A person who is logical will not be persuaded by emotion and an emotional person will not be persuaded by logic.
Why is it that we must go through a series of life lessons that are like blind spots for our greater purpose? When finally we realise our own truth it is as if we are coming home and discovering what we already intuitivley knew, but ignored all along.
What we value most determines the life we live. Imagine tow people each knowing thier life purpose. When two people are able to openly understand each other’s hierarchy of values, they both can have their and their lovers desires met simultaneously.
This requires we openly acknowledge our biological make up without guilt or shame. At the same time, religion is a major player in people’s lives. Religions now criticized as chauvinistic often freed women before patriarchal organizations took over.
Yet originally Mohammad demanded women be given an inheritance, Christian’s are ordered to love their wives and even die for them, Some Indian scholars make similar claims of hindusm.
The cultural and psychic forces are as contradictory as the diverse way we show love and lust, union and the arts of the pickup.
This “matured into what we call romanticism. The Western men began to look on woman as the embodiment of all what is pure, sacred and whole, woman became the symbol of a anima, ‘My Lady Soul’” said Jungian romance expert Robert Johnson.
“When we “fall in love” we feel completed, as though a missing part of ourselves has been returned to us. Life has intensity, a glory, an ecstasy and transcendence”
Johnson argues that the West spends so much time chasing the external that it forgets to turn around and look within.
“It is a true task of a truly modern mind to endure both the spiritual and practical as the framework for the life.”
What we are seeking cannot be reduced to a person, or a thing, but “psychological qualities; love, truth, honesty, loyalty, purpose” that we find empowering said Johnson.
I invite you on a journey to find the meaning of love in your own life. To reintegrate you’re heart and soul.
Or as Nietzsche said, we should live every moment of our lives as though we were sentenced to repeat it over and over, forever and ever, for all eternity. We should live each moment as though we were creating an eternal, unchangeable work of art.
If you want to know what inspires your lover, your boss, or your closest friend ..
….. and
If you know what inspires yourself …..
Motivating others is suddenly easy because others feel they are being heard, their aspirations met and …
.. just as importantly ….
Your own values are satified. You feel inspired, motivated and emcouraged because your values are being met at the same time.
By knowing yourself, your strengths and your weeknesses, your goals and your achiles heal, you are able to take control of yourself.
No longer will you be thrown when someone pushes your buttons. You will know what values being challenged and what you desire.
From a position of strength you meet people’s emotional and logical needs.
Then life, love, business and success come easily as you
If you want to know how to understand the values, press this link and begin the Better Loving Relationship Worksheet in our next post.
Find out what drives you and what inspires your lover.
