Love is not just for the young, at least not in the USA.
It seems that the Americans want to compete with the French – again. This time about love. (You might think they forgot that France went bust and fell to a revolution because they helped finance the American Revolution).
A French study found that 71% of French men and women aged 50 to 64 claimed to currently in love. So the Americans did their own survey and 63% of Americans over 65 claimed love, compared to 46% French.
Fortunately, the 81% French (81%) and the 75% of American’s studies (75%) responded that they had indeed had at least one great love in their life. More men claim to have found morethan one true love.
Only 3% claim they do not believe in true love.
The study was conducted via the Internet by GfK Roper Custom Research North America late August and Early September 2009. Interviews were conducted from among a nationally representative sample of 2,009 adults age 18 and older.
73% of Americans claim to be somewhat in love, 31% are passionately in love and 68% 0f 50-to 64 year olds are somewhat in love.
Perhaps the Americans are more in love, but I think it’s frightening how dispassionate they are about it.
Unlike Romeo and Juliet, very few will make lifestyle changes for love. Of those who are prepared to give it all for love, 43% said they would to leave their profession, 39% their country and 25% change their religion.
So are the national differences great? According to AARP:
77% claim “true love can exist without a radiant sex life.” The French: 35%
(What is a radiant sex life anyway? How do you statistically quanify that?)
80% say it’s “not at all likely” they’d leave their mate. The French: 67%
15% are willing to alienate family and friends for love. The French: 23%
75% believe they’ve encountered the love of their life. The French: 81%
30% could fall head over heels in love. The French: 22%
81% wouldn’t convert to another religion for love. The French: 90%
While the majority claim that romance is important in a relationship only 42% claim it is essential. 34% say romance grows more important over time.
21% you cannot be in love with someone and have a crush on another but 40% admit to the experience and 6% admitted being in that predicament.
It may seem noble that Americans claim love can exist apart from sex. However, professor Pepper Schwartz, writing in Psychology Today, suggests “I think there are a lot of Americans who WANT to separate sex and love, in fact, put them in different counties with no main roads connecting them.”
What if sickness, disability, lack of interest induced by anti-depressants or by a drug like a heart or diabetes medication? Afterall, other surveys reveal that a man is six times as likely as a woman to leave a sick mate.
Men and women between 50- 64 felt strongly that sex is part of love.
“Still, if couples start to think of great sex as optional, it’s easier to let sex become lackluster and drift in to a residual category” said Schwartz.
Swartz notes that “like all great accomplishments, great sex requires intentionality, creativity, time and prioritization”.
Afterall, research proves that sexually satisfied women are more vital.
“Love may survive a mediocre or even absent sex life- but in general, I’d say, if you want to protect your relationship, be a little more ambitious about what happens in your bedroom” said Schwartz.
So are Americans answering the what they as they believe they should? Or is it that the French are just honest and more in touch with the fickle side of human love?
The study will be published in February edition of AARP Magazine, but can be downloaded here.
